It’s Not Fair But, In Order to Learn to Live Without Them, Parts of You Must Die…

They hurt us and helped themselves at our expense. They made life hell, and oppressed us until we were made to move. They made the relationship unbearable and it wasn’t until the breaking of the relationship that we realized all that we invested in it, and all we were losing as a result.

For Israel, the Wilderness was an escape route both physically and mentally. Being physically in the wilderness, showed them that they were no longer physically in bondage. However, it took years in the wilderness in order to rid them of the mentality of where they had been–Slavery. Bondage. Captive. Parts of Israel had to LITERALLY die and a new generation be raised just to enter the Promised Land.

To be honest, they missed Egypt. The food, the certainty, the comfort, the land, the investments, and even the false gods…. they would have been happy if they didn’t HAVE to leave.

However, if they never would have left, they would have never become who God created them to be. They would never know God… They would never know themselves as a Nation…They would never know their strength and power… They would have no other identity except that which was forced on them.

Like Israel, parts of you must die in order for you to move forward. You can only kill those parts with your choices. A cognizant, conscious and consistent daily effort to let it go.

But HOW?!? We’re Glad You Asked:

  1. Acknowledge that their decisions do not define you. Rejection hurts and we think there is something wrong with us. We take their rejection as a statement and we receive it since we already feel like we failed. Rejection is NOT who you are. Rejection is what they DID.  Their Rejection displayed their inability and unwillingness to love you. Their rejection was their blindness to your value.
  2.  Face who you became. For them, You became someone who pulled out all the stops in order to get things right in your relationship. GOOD FOR YOU! HOWEVER, that was not only exhausting, but it can be a habitual focus. Having a focus gives us purpose and drive. When healing your broken relationship became a focus, it became your purpose and drive.That drive can linger. For them, Your drive WAS to fight for the relationship. Now you must fight for YOU.  You must be driven to be mentally and emotionally free of them and the hopes that you had in them. This takes conscious and consistent effort.
  3. Accept that the investment is gone. You have to cut your losses. It’s hard but it’s the only way to come to the realization that you’re looking back at a barren wasteland. There is nothing there for you.

It may be distasteful where you are. It’s emotionally uncomfortable, it’s angering and it hurts… but it will pass… it’s simply a wilderness of sorts… There is nothing behind you but your breakthrough is in front of you.

Every Action that you take towards those three steps above will help you. Understanding helps open our eyes, action and motion is what makes it real.  You’re going to have to be dogmatic about it. You’re going to have to power through it.  You’re going to have to take action daily.
God parted the Red Sea, but Israel had to walk through it… this will be a cooperative effort on your part. Hard, but worth it.